Being an empath sounds wonderful. 5 reasons it might not be.

Assuming "an Empath" as your identity can:

1. Mask hypervigilance, which is a trauma response
2. Mask being a “suppliant personality” - a specialist in giving narcissistic supply 
3.  Mask a loss or lack of self/social authenticity
4.  Mask a narcissistic, grandiose self-image.  
5. Mask passivity: being a sponge to others' emotions, or a chameleon, a defensive way of hiding






​By contrast, integrated empathy is:

• Enjoyable, flexible, useful.
• Not limited to hypervigilance, reactivity and threat deconstruction.
• Not only passive, but capable of being active, intentional.
• Coloured with love, care, concern.
• Is externally and internally directed.

For survivors of narcissistic environments, self-empathy is crucial:

• Survivors often need to reverse the lens, and think about self-empathy.
• Leads to greater self-respect, increased self-esteem, stability.
• Combats internalised toxic parenting, commonly known as harsh superego, inner parent or inner critic. 
• An increase in our capacity for love is never uni-directional.  It applies to our self, as well as others’.   

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